That’s right, dear readers. Since the sun always shines on Momma Johnson Park, we managed to get in our last regular season game of the never-ending spring kickball season last night, and it was a nail-biting win. Battling a muddy field, some true sluggers on the other team, and a particularly stringent home plate umpire, our fabled band of playground warriors pulled out an 18 – 15 victory and finished the regular season with a mind-boggling 6 – 1 record.
We certainly started things off right. By the top of the second, we led 10 – 0. Scott was on the mound for us and did his best against some dangerous feet among our opponents, the Black Team. These guys could boot it. I was going to ask for urine testing, but kept my mouth shut. To give you an idea of just how strong they were, Scott almost went through with an intentional walk. (Un)fortunately, everyone started screaming at him and he returned to his normal pitches. Hey, if we’re going to lose, we’ll lose with dignity, thank you.
But lose we did not! Our infield defense was on fire and our offense came alive in the clutch. Scott even redeemed himself from that walk debacle by striking out the last batter who, in her understandable supreme embarrasment, refused to shake hands with us. Whatever, bitch. Don’t blame us for your malformed hoof that kept arcing the ball foul.
So now, for the first time in ages, we advance to the play-offs–as the number one seed, no less! The pressure is certainly on. Can we handle it? Stay tuned.
Game 7 Brief
Record: 6 – 1 (Final regular season record)
MVP of the Game: Pete – Aside from his 3 RBIs, Pete took a gamble by playing first base for the last three innings. How did he fare on the other side of the infield? Do the words “unassisted double play” answer your question?
Weekly “Not En Fuego” Award: The outfield – We were all off last night. Kish played too deep, Volpe played too short, I lost my depth perception in the lights, Josh’s gloves acted as ball repellent anytime he tried to make a catch, Caleb got too greedy, and Karl fell flat on his ass. We need to seriously step it up for next week.
Quote of the Week: “I hope you’re out, you dick!” ~ Stacy, encouraging Kish and his daredevil base running