Last Wednesday marked the start of fall kickball season. Pete stepped up to be Team CFO this time, and I already approve of the new administration. His first act was to move us back down to the Pity Party division. Safe and sound among the functionally retarded, we sailed to a 16 – 1 victory in our opening match. It was almost enough to forgive him for getting us baby blue t-shirts for the third season in a row. Almost.
We had one major departure in our brief off-season, and that was of our fence-hopping left fielder, Kish. In his place, we now have Matt, brother of last season’s three-time MVP, Joe. Matt made a great first impression, making great grabs in the outfield and kicking what is surely the longest home run any of us have ever witnessed. He also could never remember where he was in the batting order, so he clearly fits right in.
The main highlight of our opposition was the pitcher, who was wearing jeans and a t-shirt and shoes with no laces. Consequently, every time he kicked the ball, the shoe on his kicking foot would careen across the infield. By the time he got to first base, the other one had fallen off, too. Also of note was the giant Balkan brute who showed up late to join them. He and I almost collided at second base, and I’m sure I would have born the brunt of the damage.
Some may say our victory was a hollow one; we dropped down a division and our opponents were undermanned (literally). But frankly, it’s been so long since we’ve had a win, we couldn’t care less. Yes, this season looks promising, folks. Stay tuned.
Game 1 Brief
Record: 1 – 0
MVP of the Game: Matt – One of the most impressive debuts on record, for reasons mentioned above.
Weekly “Not En Fuego” Award: Pete – Baby blue again? Really?
Quote of the Week: “Did anyone else get the ‘wiped my brow’ handshake?” ~ Spitz