Happy Friday to you, sports fans!
Kickball season began last night, under the lights in Momma Johnson Park. We had a near complete turn-out for our opener. Three of our four rookies were present, and their excitement was palpable. Amanda even wore some flair in team colors. Flair or not, we were clearly the best-dressed team at the field, as Volpe finally delivered our outstanding new uniforms. Here’s a shot of me, modeling our threads at my butchest.
We played a tight game, but ultimately came up short, losing 6 – 5. We were hot from the start, scoring a run in the first, but our opponents in purple answered back quickly. Their first batter popped one to right field, which I admittedly bobbled. It was a rather shallow kick, so I assumed that he’d hold at first. Well, you should never assume. This overachiever took off for second. The usual comedy of errors ensued and, sure enough, this pantywaste managed a triple. I know you shouldn’t stereotype anymore than you should assume, but really, why are people from the Eastern hemisphere so freakin’ determined?
More clumsy fielding and an inability to drive in runners soon had us trailing by four. But just like those imbibing bimbettes who littered Hoboken’s street corners on St. Patty’s Day, the Goddamnit Gerber squad began to rally, and going into the seventh inning we had tied the game. We failed to score a go-ahead run in our last at-bat, and our defense faltered in our final turn in the field, allowing our opponents to win the day.
There were some highlights to be had, though. Joe made some crucial catches in center field. George proved himself at both infield and outfield positions. Erin crafted a sound batting order in Spitz’s absence. However, without Spitz, no one ever came in to relieve Scott. We still haven’t settled on a new third baseperson. And Yours Truly was in the midst of a controversial call that, had it gone our way, would have significantly increased our chances of winning. But where was our raucous rebuttal from Rachel? The Argumentative One’s absence has yet to be explained.
We headed for Lounge 11 afterward, to christen the season with a few rounds of Flip Cup. We managed a full three rounds of it (played amongst our elitist selves, naturally), before the dancing began. That might be a new record for us. We’re so easily distracted by pop music and bright shiny things and the like. Some other patrons were looking for people to play with, but our focus was shattered. We were captives of the beat. By the time “Single Ladies” came on, and I obliged my teammates with its signature moves for the last fucking time, all hopes of friendly competition had evaporated.
Our next game is not until Tuesday, April 6. I hope that the week off does not affect us. We put forth a good showing this week. Stay tuned to see how we fare, and to see who steps forward to write the next recap!
Game 1 Brief
Record: 0 – 1
MVP of the Week: Jenny – For her admirable on-base percentage and solid infield defense, all in the face of Syrcause’s casually announced loss to Butler in the NCAA play-offs.
Weekly Not En Fuego Award: Scott – Wasting no time in falling into old habits, our embattled muse failed to field a rapid succession of bunts late in the game, allowing crucial runners to load the bases. He also fell on his ass in his follow-through.
Quote of the Week: “Everyone’s wearing the same shirts. This is so confusing!” ~ Erin, identifying a problem that has existed since we began playing kickball two years ago.